What Kind Of Fool?...

My sister and I went shopping in Columbia all day Saturday and I do mean ALL day. Well we went to Kohls & Ross and did a little damage then we ate at Red Lobster and then we were off in search of Mark Roberts Fairies. (you know the ones I blogged about a few weeks ago that they do NOT sell here in Florence anywhere). We went to two places on Two Notch Road, nada. One was closed, the other said they sell them at their other location but only at Christmas. We were hunting for the third store on Sunset but time ran out. Drat. I REALLY wanted a St. Patricks Day Fairy dammit.

Okay what is relevant about the pic above (besides the chick has a shape that I am SO sure does not need a body shaper) you may be asking. I detected a little pudge and decided I could use some smoothing out here & there.
So I found a body shaper.
This morning Stacy is helping me get into it.
Him: "What the hell is this thing for?"
Me: "A torture device"
Him: "Why are you wearing it?"
Me:"Cos' I was looking pudgy and this will help until I get a tummy tuck"
Him:"You women are crazy as hell I wouldn't be caught dead in one of these"
Me:"Men do wear them"
Him: "No Way!".
I am sweating like a pig by now and we are both out of breath from trying to wrestle me into the shaper.
Madison is sitting in her Daddy's La-Z-Boy silently watching the proceedings while sucking on her sippy cup of milk.
She's probably thinking 'I'll have to watch my weight so I don't get big as her and have to do THAT".
So now I sit here at work feeling slimmer and trimmer but realizing that if I take a deep breath and bust this thing I am going to fly all around the building like a baloon in the Macy's Parade...